Tapped out

27 Jan

Everyone, I am just tired. I was thisclose to calling in for a mental health day today and taking Eli to Sharron’s so I could just have a day to sit and stare at the wall without anything to do. I haven’t had a day like that in oh, about 15 months. I decided against it because (1) I had people scheduled, particularly clients who have been difficult to engage and I didn’t want to flake on them and make building rapport even harder, (2) I have group on Wednesdays and I don’t like it when the co-leader leaves me to run it alone so I wouldn’t want to do that to her and (3) general work guilt just get up and you’ll feel better blah blah blah.

A few weeks ago we decided Thursday nights would be Erin’s night to go out and do whatever, even if it’s just going to a mall and walking around for a while because I really haven’t been getting out without Eli AT ALL, hardly even to the grocery store. I’m starting to go a little crazy from it. I got out for dinner with June the first Thursday it was declared and through various scheduling problems it hasn’t happened since. Andy has band practice weekly and then several times a week if they play live so it was meant to ensure there was some sort of balance to that and for some reason it just keeps getting pushed aside. I usually find ways to ensure Eli is taken care of if I have to get a long run in but that’s not so much an issue anymore. I need to work on this. I really just feel exhausted the last few weeks and I think that’s part of it. I’ll figure it out. Just needed to vent. I NEED TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE.

Along those lines, Eli starts daycare next week. He’ll go three days a week and for the most part, that works just dandy with our schedules. Granted, it makes for A LOT of days that Andy is off and Eli will still go to daycare but I figure it’s more important to have that consistency most of the time and it’ll give Andy some good downtime. I’m a little jealous since Friday (my extra day off) won’t be a daycare day but I could probably try to do some juggling so I get some of them as needed. He’s been a few times now to visit and seems to do fine there. This Saturday is Parents’ Night Out hosted by the daycare. They keep the kids from 5-11 and it’s a chance for the parents to get out for a night and they do movies, games, and dinner with the kids. It’s also a good chance for them to hang out with their friends. They do this the last Saturday of every month, how cool is that? There are two other boys at the daycare around Eli’s age (I think they are a few months older). So that will be the first time he is there for a length of time. I’m sure it will go well but I’m a little nervous nontheless. However, I am REALLY looking forward to going out for dinner!

I also went nuts (again) and signed up for The Big Climb. In late March I’ll be climbing 69 flights of stairs as part of a charity fundraiser for Leukemia/Lymphoma (that’s 1,311 steps). If you click on that link, you can donate by going to the donate page then typing in my name. I’ve met the donation requirement they have (thanks Mom!!) but anything extra surely wouldn’t hurt. All for cancer research! My legs are aching in preparation for the event.

Hmmm…what else. Oh, ELI. That’s right. I knew there was something. He continues to amaze me with how fast he learns. This weekend I asked him to bring me my foam roller (a running thing) and he didn’t know what it was so I showed him (he likes rolling it around) what I meant. Three days later I asked him to bring me my foam roller and he went and got it for me! We were reading Where The Wild Things Are and I opened the book and he pointed to Max’s dog and said, “Dog”. Granted, the “g” sound wasn’t very distinct but wow! We went to the beach last weekend and he looooved it. I wasn’t able to get pictures because I was flying solo and most of my time was spent trying to keep him from running straight into the water (didn’t succeed at that, finally I just let him do it and HE LOVED IT). He got to pet all sorts of dogs, the people and pets were really nice about him squealing with glee every time he saw another dog walking close to us. He would run up and start babbling and the people were just really sweet about letting him pet their dogs. He also tortured an 8 year old boy by being completely enamored with him. Eli just followed him and either stared at him or gave him his best smiles. The boy’s mother absolutely loved it but the boy wasn’t having it. I don’t think he liked his teeny stalker. He also enjoyed playing in the wet sand and became very frustrated at my refusal to let him run about the parking lot.

I decided to take him to the beach in order to avoid a repeat of our previous walk around the neighborhood during which he OBSESSED about walking in the street. All he wanted to do was walk from one curb to the other with loooooong stops in the middle of the street. I wouldn’t let him do it which means I got (1) loud shrieky scream when I tried to entice him to the curb (aka pulling him) and (2) THE WET NOODLE when I finally had to physically remove him to let a car through. I think the two’s are settling in early and stealing aspects of my mellow, agreeable child. I sometimes miss the days of the 5 second memory. Finally I just let him walk in the street once the coast was clear because the refusal just seemed to make it more desirable. I still can’t decide if I just totally got suckered by a 1 year old and bought myself a potential world of trouble because I gave in or if I did the effective thing by letting him get it out of his system. Once I let him he pretty much let it go and continued on with his walk. Who knows. This parenting thing is a total guessing game.

I finally put new pictures up (sorry!!) and here’s a few videos as well. I don’t know why my brain went dead for January but I really didn’t do much of anything documentation-wise. These videos aren’t particularly thrilling but what a sweet boy! He turns 15 months old on Friday. How time flies.

At the beach:

Time for bed, Daddy reading a story (in the voice of Ringo Starr from Thomas the Tank Engine):

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