The Best Comfort There Is

19 Nov

Eli often runs to me when he’s upset or insists on snuggling with only me when he doesn’t feel well. He’ll wake up early from naps but still be tired, wanting only to nap a little longer. He’ll sleep on Andy gladly enough but if he happens to see me, he’ll usually insist on the hand over and finish his nap off on me. Andy takes this in stride–much better than I ever would. He always says something to the effect of “I don’t blame you, Mommy makes it all better” or “I would rather cuddle on her, too”, etc. Although I rarely want to do other things (restroom break, water, have free arms), I remind myself that the period of time I have where Eli wants ME to comfort him is rather short. So if it’s not something that violates the rules (he’s in a time out, something we’ve said he can’t do, etc) I gladly welcome the times he wants to sit on me or receive comfort, I welcome that without end.

He seemed fine most of the week but had the oddest cough whenever he went down for the night. A little dry cough with a high pitched wheeze at the end–not enough to wake him up but enough for me to take note that it sounded odd. He was progressively more congested throughout the week but in a fine mood. This morning, he just seemed off. He was whiny but the whiny had a different quality to it–a pitifulness, if you will, and it made me think he was really getting sick. He had no fever and aside from insisting I remain by his side at all times, he seemed otherwise fine. He usually will try to sweet talk me away from getting ready in the mornings with the offers of watching Sesame Street but this morning when I said my usual, “No, Mommy has to get ready for work, Eli’s going to Berry Patch” he just melted into tears and refusals. He refused his cereal bar (WARNING!) if I wouldn’t go sit with him. I played the game of “What hurts?” that I play with him when he feels bad. If he says no to the usual stuff (I’m really looking to see if he’s teething here) I start suggesting silly stuff–“Does your booty hurt? Does your hair hurt? Do your mitochondria hurt?” and he always laughs because “Mommy silly, mommy so silly”. He didn’t laugh this morning. He just cried. He finally opted for food and a bit of milk once Andy put it out. Andy has been on nights so he took him to daycare. Once at work, I told June that I wouldn’t be surprised if I got called to come get him. He hadn’t been running a fever but he seemed to feel so poorly.

So I got the call at 12:30. When I got there he had been asleep a short while. They said that although he usually plows through lunch, when they served lunch he just put his head on the table and refused to eat. He was running a mild fever when I got him (about 100) so I just let him run it. He went straight to bed and slept 2.5 hours. He got up, seemed to still feel rather puny, threw up (ON ME), and then after a bit seemed to feel a little better. We watched movies. He would think he felt better and start playing, then a wave of ick would hit him, and he’d start crying and come to me and just want to be held. I hate that he felt bad but good lord, if I could just freeze that moment when I picked him up and he sighed with the relief of it. He curled up into me and looked up to give me a kiss before burying his head in my shoulder. If only I could bottle that. My sweet little boy.

After a while, he seemed better. He refused most food but asked for popcorn so I figured what the hey? and gave him popcorn. He ate most of a bag, some crackers, then wheedled a cereal bar out of me right before bedtime. We usually refuse those because he would live on those if he could, so we restrict them to one at breakfast. However, I was worried he hadn’t eaten enough so I caved. I’m sure y’all would laugh if you could hear me when I gave it to him: “You are ONLY getting this because you haven’t eaten all day AND you threw up so don’t go thinking this will happen every night!!” Eli: “Otay, Mommy.” As a mental health worker, it crossed my mind that I am creating a tiny bulimic who will throw up in order to get cereal bars. Such is the life.

He went down tonight without a complaint and seemed a bit tired but in a good mood. Once his food stayed down I gave him a little dose of Motrin in hopes it would help him sleep better. I hope he feels better tomorrow. I hate to see him so sad.

One Response to “The Best Comfort There Is”

  1. Lolli November 19, 2010 at 5:21 am #

    As a non mental health worker, I can only tell you the only thing you’re creating is a very healthy little boy. Don’t over think it, go with whatever he can eat & keep down when he’s sick. Love

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