Kids are harder than clients

14 Jul

Ok, I caved. Although I thought I’d be able to hold on and persevere despite an all out battle on Saturday–it got to the point that he refused to sit on the potty at ALL–and a venting phone call to my mother, I held tough all day Saturday. Andy was working an OT shift he had picked up and I was still a little knocked down with the chest cold (which is still lingering–WHAT IS UP). Sunday morning, I was horrified at the idea of the Day Out with Thomas with a child on potty training cold turkey day three–all I could envision was soaked car seats, soaked clothes, miserable child, miserable parents in a battle of wills in every gas station bathroom between here and Snoqualmie.

So we threw in the towel for now. I’m not ashamed to admit that I don’t think I can handle the constant toilet battle on my own–I’m not cut out for single parenthood and don’t think I could have done it much longer than a day–and Eli just got downright defiant early Saturday afternoon. He skipped his nap that day in favor of peeing all over his bed less than 10 minutes after I put him down (he REFUSED to sit on the potty longer than a few seconds before his nap although he hadn’t peed in over an hour). I went in there and wordlessly changed his sheets and clothes and put him back in bed. After another hour, he was still playing around in bed. I went in there to tell him to knock it off and he had peed all over everything and pooped in his underwear. He was happy as could be, it didn’t seem to bother him a bit. I changed him (and the sheets) again and put him back in bed. He played around for another 45 minutes (until the usual end of his nap) and I just finally got him up. We had constant potty battles the rest of the day, lots of accidents, and just no fun at all. I stuck to my guns until bedtime and I was just exhausted and defeated.

My mom pointed out that he’s been a relatively compliant child and he’s right–I’ve never really had a lot of battles with him over anything. Two naps to one? Done in a day. No binky? A bit of complaining for a few nights but nothing big. Sleep? 12 hours at 5 1/2 months and consistent since then. Toddler bed? He STILL never gets out of bed until I tell him it’s okay. She pointed out that this is the first thing he’s really challenged me on and I feel so, so unprepared. It’s so hard not to think that there’s something WRONG with him because he’s fairly agreeable most of the time. It’s hard not to get REALLY MAD when he is just MEAN to me because he is flat out defiant–he will hit me, he will say, “I do not love you, Mommy” and it’s all the more frustrating because I know that’s when I really need to stick to my guns–“Well, that makes me sad that you would say you don’t love me but you still have to do X, sorry kid.” when all I really want to do is sit him down and explain to him in great detail that HEY, YOU ARE BEING COMPLETELY UNREASONABLE.

So it’s been postponed for a few weeks until Andy and I have a stretch of days off together.

Day Out with Thomas was really fun, even for the adults. It was at the Northwest Railway Museum in Snoqualmie. They had a real Thomas (well, it was actual engine size and attached to passenger cars but didn’t really do any pulling) and we got to go for a ride on it! Eli was super excited and when asked his favorite part–“Riding on Thomas–I love it!” They also had a tent of nothing but train tables and well, we spent a lot of time there. They also had a bouncy house and we spent A LOT of time there because the kid has been seriously jonesing for a bouncy house ever since Carsten’s birthday party. We were good consumers and got him a sweat shirt, a Thomas sippy cup, and he got to pick out one train he wanted (Toby). He had a great time. Afterwards, we went for Mexican food then stopped at Snoqualmie Falls since we had seen it on the train ride and Andy had never been. A really fabulous day.

He’s been having a few hard weeks at daycare, lots of acting out, not listening to directions, being disruptive at naptime, etc. Nicolie wondered if it didn’t have to do with the move and all the changes–she said that sometimes kids seem to have a delay on their reaction to things because they don’t realize the changes are permanent at first. My boy had a lot of changes at once–his day care moved, we moved, he got his big boy bed–all within a month. It reminded me that several times in the last two weeks when I picked him up from day care he would ask to go to the “old house” and say he didn’t like the “new house”. He said he didn’t like the yard or his new room, he just wanted to go back to the “old house” and even said he wanted to go back there once I explained our stuff wasn’t there. He’s done it a few times with day care as well–he’ll ask me to take him to the “old Berry Patch” instead of the new one. It about broke my heart, my sad little boy. He’s been such a trooper!

In happier news, we’re all going camping tomorrow. ALL OF US. I am so happy Will decided to come along with us. We’re headed to Marble Creek campground in the Mt. Baker-Snoqualmie NF and I hope it’s a great time. We’ve got a HUGE tent (6 person) for me, Eli and Andy and Will has his own tent (this was his choice). We’ll be there for two nights and it’s only a 90 minute drive in case things go south on us (aka Eli freaks out, which I completely do not expect). Tonight is all packing and organizing camping gear and Andy is going to band practice once Eli goes to bed. I’m really looking forward to it! Pictures up next week–there will be pictures from camping and I’ll also post the Day Out with Thomas pictures!


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